Atsui

 Band: Moran

Pairing: Soan&Hitomi

Rating: 18+

Genre: romance

Warnings: erotic scenes

Note: Everything because of Hitomi and his vine.

Hitomi entered the hotel room and approache the window, because he wanted to open it. It was so hot here and he was tired and he just needed a moment to relax.

He wasn't surprised, when he heard that door just opened. He knew who it was. Only one person was allowed to enter his room without knocking.

He didn't turn back. He went out onto the balcony. He leaned against the barrier and stared at the setting sun.

He trembled of pleasure, when he felt that someone hugged him.

"It's finally hot, right, Hito-chan?" he heard Soan's voice next to his ear.

The drummer leaned on his shoulder.

"Too hot" said Hitomi, patting Tomofumi's hand. "It's tiring."

"You're whining" sighed Soan, breathing into vocalist's hair. "Come with me."

Soan grabbed Hitomi's hand and pulled him into the room.

"I want to lay down" said Hitomi, taking tablet from the cupboard. "And record a vine."

"Vine" Soan shook his head.

Hitomi and his vines were some kind of mystery for him.

Hitomi turned on a camera, said that he's tired and laying down on the bed. He looked at the impatient Soan, who stared at him with an expression doubting humanity.

"Give me this" the drummer took away the tablet from Hitomi, when he posted his vine on Twitter.

Soan put the gadget on the cupboard and leaned over Hitomi.

"I'll show you vines."

Soan's kiss made Hitomi tremble. He twisted his fingers through his hair and pulled him closer to him. Hitomi didn't notice when his white shirt slipped off his shoulders and was on the floor, nor when the rest of his clothes shared her fate. Not to mention the fact that not only his clothes were laid on the panels.

He sighed, when Soan's hand slipped from his hips to his tights. He moved his legs obediently, at which the drummer only smirked.

Yes, it was exactly this kind of relax which he wanted. He realized this especially in the moment, when his fingers tightened on the hotel sheet.

"Yes, it's finally hot" said Hitomi, when Soan lay down next to him.

His voice was still trembling. He couldn't remember last time when he felt so good.

"And you're not too hot?" asked Tomofumi, who still hadn't calmed his breath.

"I could even burn because of the reason, why I am so hot now" Hitomi hugged Soan. "Tomofumi?"

"Yes?"

"Forget it. Turn off the light" mumbled Hitomi, closing his eyes.

Soan tugged the lamp chain and the room went dark.

"Goodnight, Hito-chan" whispered Soan, kissing Hitomi's forehead.

"Goodnight" replied Hitomi, listening to his loved one's heartbeat.

After a moment, he felt asleep, as if this sound lulled him to sleep.

The end

Always on your side

Band: Moran

Pairing: Soan&Hitomi

Rating: 17+

Genre: romance, slice of life

Warnings: -

Note: Because I found out that Hitomi neglected his health in the past.

 I remember the day, when you first entered our studio. I remember it very well. You seemed a little confused and shy. You have never liked new situations. You sat behind the drumset, suddenly becoming very calm, you took drumsticks in your hands and you started playing. At first you hesitated, but later all four of us were stuck in our seats. You put your drumsticks down and looked at us expectantly. Shige called out that he had said "it's gonna be great", Lay and Mizuha exchanged looks, and I tried to look away from your eyes. But I couldn't.

"Tomofumi..." That name echoed in my thoughts every day. Even though I saw you at rehearsals, even though we played concerts together, and even though we spent a lot of time together, because it turned out that we got on well with each other, I still didn't have enough. Not enough of your lovely smile, not enough of your hypnotizing eyes, not enough of your deep, low-pitched voice, not enough of your muscles outlined beneath the fabric of your gray jacket, and not enough of your happy laughter.

It was in the Autumn of 2003. I fell ill then, but I ignored it. You were the first to notice when something was really wrong.

"Here you go" you gave me a cup of hot tea. "You sound like you were about to spit your lungs out for a few weeks now. You really think you shouldn't see a doctor, Sanaka?"

"Come on, Towa. I'm fine" I said, coughing again.

You put your hand to my forehead and sighed.

"Yes, no problem at all. And your fever is terribly high as a part of the prevailing fashion. Come home and get cured. Come back, when you recover."

"Really, Towa, I'll be fine" I said, glaring at you.

You were twenty-one and already gave the impression of a person not to be discussed with. But I didn't give up so easily. Not that day.

A few days later - yes.

"Sanaka, go see a doctor" you looked at me firmly. "You can barely speak, you can barely walk, you can barely see. Go see a doctor, screw the tour, health is more important, Hitomi!"

Back then, calling me by name meant you were mad at me.

"I am..."

I wanted to tell you again that I'm okay. That you shouldn't worry.

However, I had a violent, severe coughing attack. You put your arms around my waist and put me on a chair.

"Sanaka?" suddenly I heard fear in your voice. "Sanaka, your hand... your mouth... For gods' sake!"

You pulled out your phone and called the ambulance, as I assumed. I looked at my hand. It shone with red, fresh blood. I could feel its metallic taste...

"Hitomi" you hugged me, before I passed out.

I felt safe. And it was probably this moment, when I realized that I love you.

Doctors thought there's a possibility that I wouldn't survive this. Pneumonia was at a very advanced stage. You've been sitting with me for days and nights. You didn't leave my side.

"You're an idiot" I heard one night.

You were whispering. You probably thought that I'm asleep.

"Did you really not realize that you could die? You're my friend. I wouldn't get over your death. I just can't do something like that."

"Towa" I wanted to say it fondly, but it sounded like dog's growling.

You shook your head as if you wanted to shook off bad thoughts.

"Don't go. Not now, when I love you like a brother" you looked at me with blurry eyes.

I sighed. Your words should please me, but that's when the voice in my head started screaming that this kind of love didn't satisfy me. I wanted more, I wanted you.

I tried to confess my love for you many times. First time at Shige's birthday in 2004, remember? Second time, when we announced the breakup. Third, when we played our last concert as Fatima. Fourth, when we played together in the project. And so on and on. But I still couldn't. My voice was still in my throat as soon as I started to utter this short sentence. I took comfort in sleeping with different people just to forget about you.

But I couldn't forget about you at all. I just couldn't do it, when you called me almost everyday, just to talk, when we had a day off. When you were taking me out on the most gray and cloudy days, because you think that if the weather can't cheer up, then at least we should. When we were spending our birthday together, getting drunk and singing some drunken songs. By the way, that's probably the only thing you shouldn't be doing - singing.

How can you forget someone, when every nice gesture, word, smile, brush of your hand, look gives you a wave of heat? In confrontation with you I was like all those women and effeminate men being dragged to bed by me. You were never effeminate. Sometimes stylists tried to turn you into a woman, but it didn't work.

And then we decided to start a new band. Our own. Different from Fatima. Different from everything.

"So you want to be called by your real name, Kanoma?" you asked, smiling meanly.

You never stopped calling me "Sanaka" or "Hitomi". "Kanoma" just didn't exist in your directionary.

"Yes" I nodded. "And what about you? You still want to be Towa?"

"No, I want to leave the past behind" you replied. "I like the word "soar" in English. It would look nice as a nickname."

"It doesn't look nice" I said. "It needs to be made into something more Japanese. "Soan" for example?"

"Okay. It's even easier for me to pronounce it" you smiled slightly.

You've been called that ever since. I gave you that name. Unique and beautiful. Like you.

I went back to watching you at rehearsals and concerts again. To laughing with you on the set of music videos, drinking after hours, hugging you, when the hard times came. Yes, I could hug you. It was easier than confessing my feelings.

I already knew a lot about you. What do you like, what you don't like, for example you love strawberries and you hate winter. You're ticklish, tend to put on weight easily, often panic for no reason and it's better not to start a discussion with you. Waking you up is out of question, as Velo once learned painfully. I could list all your favorite bands, movies, books, mangas, even magazines that you read from time to time. I knew your friends, who you don't like, and who do you wish would step on a Lego block with their bare foot. I was able to make you laugh, when you were in a bad mood, to move you with a new text, to cheer you up, when something happened.

I knew everything, I could do everything. So why I couldn't confess my feeling? I was in my thirties and I still acted like a child.

I didn't expect that we would finally get together. That at last someone will push us towards each other and we will confess our feelings. And that it will be such a literal push. Patience has never been Zill's trait, and as you can see, this time it was the last straw for him.

I remember lying side by side on the unfolded couch. In the end, I got what I wanted for so many years. My biggest dream has come true. And another thing got added to my list - you're freaking good in bed.

"Nee, Hito-chan?" you started, playing with unlit cigarette. "Have you really waited for so long with confessing your feelings to me?"

"I think I waited... Seven or eight years?" I said, cuddling against your naked torso, still wet with sweat. "Let's not talk about it. I feel so stupid already..."

You brushed my hair out of my face and kissed my cheek. There was something... sorry about it.

"If you told me that you love me that day, when you wanted to tell me for the first time..." you started and hesitated for a moment. "If you did it, I would probably say "No"."

I looked up at you. Your gaze said it all - you really would say "No".

"And I suspect that even if you had done it a year ago, I would have refused as well" you sighed heavily. "Sometimes it is better to wait, because if you drink your tea too quickly, you will burn yourself."

"But if I do it too late, it'll cool down" I noticed.

"You just have to find the right moment, Hito-chan" you smiled and kissed me tenderly.

I've known the taste of your kisses since then. Strawberry gum and nicotine.

And I don't need anything else.

The end

Reverie

Band: Gotcharocka

Pairing: Jui&Jun

Rating: 17+

Genre: slice of life

Warnings: character death

Note: Jui doesn't like to talk about this day. He wants to be alone and not alone in the same time.

What would Jun do with this situation?

Jun burst into the rehearsal room. It was a sunny day in July. His sister just sent him a cute photo of his niece.

"Hi~!" Jun did a pirouette.

Toya looked at him.

"Hello" he mumbled, then sipped his coffee.

"What made you even more happy than usual?" asked Jui, leaning over the papers.

He probably tried to write something, but judging from the crumpled balls of paper around him, he didn't have any inspiration.

"Didn't you notice the weather outside?" Jun was confused.

Toya looked out the window.

"Sunny" he muttered, taking a sip of his coffee and putting the mug on the table. "Is this something extraordinary?"

"It's a beautiful day, Toya, beautiful day!" Jun sat on the couch. "Anyway, today I'm going for a walk with my sister after the rehearsal! Really, it's wonderful. She sent me a picture of Fumiko, she's so cute..."

Guitarist blabbed until he heard the door opening. He looked at it, but it was already closed.

"Have I said something wrong?" asked Jun.

"I have no idea" replied Toya. "Does Shingo ever plan to show up?"

"I don't know" Jun got up. "Maybe I should check on Jui?"

"He seemed sad. You should go" said Toya. "Jun?"

"What?"

"You can confess your feelings by the way" Toya winked to him.

Jun flushed and sighed.

"It won't be necessary" Jun chuckled nervously and left the rehearsal room.

But Jui wasn't behind the door. He wasn't in the building at all. He didn't answer phone calls, what they could explain easily - he left it in the room. As if he disappeared into thin air.

“And what? Rehearsal is over already?” Shingo hid his bass.

“Like you cared about them” Toya sighed.

“You know, I managed to come here, but this moron disappeared somewhere” Shingo shrugged hopelessly.

“Don’t call Jui a moron or I’ll put your bass in your ass” growled Jun, trying to call all of Junichi’s friends.

But nobody knew, where Jui was and some of them saw him for the last time half a year ago.

“Okay, okay, sorry for tarnishing the honor of your unfulfilled love” said Shingo, then he left.

“If you'd confess your feelings to him already, it wouldn’t be unfulfilled!” noticed Toya.

Jun snorted as he tucked Jui's cellphone in his pocket.

"I guess I have to tell him at last, because you won't leave me alone” he sighed. “But we have to find him first.”

“I'll look for him. You were supposed to meet your sister” Toya patted his shoulder. “Besides, Jui is a grown man. He won’t do anything stupid.”

“Right” Jun got up and picked up his phone. “Yes, little sister? Yes, I'll be there soon. No, a little trouble at work. No, nothing serious. Well, bye.”

He hung up. Nothing serious, of course. Except Jui disappeared and he was so worried like World War Three was about to start soon.

Afternoon walk with his sister blew up his negative thoughts. Jun had been playing with kids: swinging them on a see-saw and spinning on a merry-go-round… Later he took his sister and her kids for ice cream. Fumiko got the glaze on herself and Kimiko pretended that her ice cream was a unicorn's horn. Apart that at that moment the walk had to come to it's end, because a chocolate ball of ice cream on girl's hair didn’t make her mum happy, Jun knew that he would remember this day really well.

When he was walking home, it started raining. He noticed that it was getting colder with every minute of their walk and dark clouds were gathering overhead, but Jun hoped that it would be sunny at least until evening. He put the hood over his head and quickened his pace. At one point, the rain started pouring. Guitarist sighed and started running. He was getting wetter and wetter.

“I hate this weather” he mumbled, hiding at the bus stop from the rain.

And then he saw him.

Jui was standing across the road. Soaked more than him, without an umbrella, without a hood, with hair stuck together in water pods.

Vocalist looked at him for a moment, then turned around and walked to the bridge over the pond where they were. Jun didn't even think for a moment and ran after him. He knew something was wrong. Now he was sure of it.

Whenguitarist reached his friend, he was leaning against the railing and didn’t seem to notice him.

“Jui?” Jun walked to him, trying to calm his breath after running. “Jui, what happened? Jui, come on, talk to me!”

“It’s frightening” whispered Jui.

The rain was pouring stronger and stronger, hitting the water surface with more and more force.

“You're her age. I’m afraid to get close to you, because I know that your age will remind me that she could have been this old, if she had lived. If she didn't die seven years ago…”

Jun froze. He understood now, why Jui left the rehearsal room. His sister… Today… Yes, it had to be an anniversary. But Junichi never talked about it. About that day.

“I didn’t know, Jui…” he wanted to say more, but the vocalist laughed somehow… empty.

“I won’t forbid you from being happy” replied Jui, clenching his finger on the barrier. “I just always wonder to this day, what if she was still alive. What if I could hug her or call her. Would she send me photos of her children or would I take her on a walk? I’ll never know this, Jun. You don't even have an idea, how much it hurts.”

Jun caught Jui before he fell to his knees. He was trembling. In fact, guitarist didn't know, if Jui was too cold or too emotional. Or maybe both.

“We should go before you get sick” said Jun calmly, still hugging Junichi. “We should hide from the…”

Loud thunder interrupted him. He sighed.

“...storm” ended Jun. “Jui!”

“Okay, wait” Jui closed his eyes. “I have a feeling that she’s getting angry, because I still didn’t do it.”

“But what?” Jun felt a little confused.

“I told you that I’m afraid of getting close to you. But I didn’t mean that I’m scared of being your friend” explained Jui. “We’re friends already. But I… want something more than friendship.”

Jun didn’t have time to react. Colder than rain, if it was possible, Jui’s lips touched his own. Jun closed his eyes. He didn’t know, why his first thought was that Toya and Shingo will finally leave him alone.

He kissed Jui back, catching him. They moved away only when lightning struck a tree nearby. The thunder was so loud that they both fell and were most likely deaf for a moment.

“We should go” said Jui, jumping on his feet.

Then he grabbed Jun’s hand and despite the fact that he still was a little dizzy, ran towards the bus stop.

“Junichi, wait, I can’t run as fast as you” Jun was panting, trying to not trip on stairs. “Junichi!”

“You should quit smoking like me” Jui laughed shortly.

Jun shook his head and clenched his fingers on Jui’s hand. He didn’t want to let him go now. And maybe even never.

When they reached the bus stop, they sat on a bench and looked at the sky. It started to clear. Or so they thought. Until they heard another thunder.

“Well, I think that after what you’ve done, even if I wanted to, I can’t replace your sister, Junichi” said Jun.

Jui laughed weakly and coughed.

“And wandering around the city in such a weather in a short-sleeved T-shirt and shorts will still affect you, you'll see.”

“But you’ll take care of me, right?” the vocalist smiled fondly, stroking Jun’s hand. “Promise me that you won’t disappear like her.”

“Junichi, you silly” Jun shook his head. “She didn’t disappear. You told this yourself. She’s living in your memories. As long as you remember her, she’s with you. I’ll just accompany her.”

Jui closed his eyes. He shook his head, trying not to cry.

“I love you” he whispered, hugging Jun. “I love you, because you can see the light in a complete darkness. And sometimes this light even has different sources.”

“I love you too” Jun smiled fondly.

He was right. This day really was one of his best memories.

The end

Despite everything

Band: DIV

Pairing: Chobi&Chisa

Rating: 17+

Genre: romance

Warnings: -

Note: Chobi, Chisa and their little own world.

 When I woke up in the morning, you are still asleep. You're laying with a face cuddled in a pillow, covered with quilt to the tip of the nose. I kiss you on the forehead and you just just twist a little and mutter in your sleep.

I put my dressing-gown on and go to the kitchen. I prepare the water for the hot drinks and sit on the windowsill. I'm waiting.

I'm making coffee and you appear in the doors. With messy hair, sleepy and completely distracted. You watch me pour you that green quince tea of yours that you drink every morning. You're smiling. You sit down on the counter, I go back to my windowsill and there is silence for a moment. Until you mumble something like, "I burned my tongue again". Standard. Then we start talking. As if your whining was your starting signal.

Our conversation continues until I finish my coffee, jump off the windowsill and put the mug in the sink. Then you go silent for a while, finish your tea, stand next to me, put your cup next to mine, and you usually tease me somehow. Then you run to the bedroom and I chase you like a naughty child, who accosted a parent, who was washing dishes. I catch your waist as you try to close the door before my face and after a little goofing around coupled with a funny struggle, you land underneath me on the bed, giggling.

Still laughing, we run to the bathroom like kids. You usually win, unless I kept you awake last night. Then I just let you win. You have to win. I want it. Because I love the way you laugh when you point out again to me that I lost. I love your laugh.

When we are ready to go, I tease you because of your clothes and you always say the same thing as the answer. You're always pointing out, how thick the soles of my shoes are. I should get used to it, but it still irritates me a bit.

We go to rehearsal. We're first, the rest is always late. Usually you tease me more and you cross the border of being tactful. But I'm patient and I don't care. I just pretend that I didn't hear it.

During the rehearsal, I forget that I'm secretly mad at you. You do your best, sometimes even too much. I worry about you, I tell you to not overwork yourself, but of course you don't listen. Because why would you?

The rehearsal is ended. We grab our things and go home. It's chilly and you can't handle the cold as usual. I take my jacket off and throw it over your shoulders. You're worried that I will catch a cold. I answer that I'm always warm with you. You smile and I kiss you gently. I was mad at you? When?

We're going home and, of course, something goes wrong on the stairs. Did I tell you not to overdo yourself? As usual, you have an attack, as usual I have to pick you up and carry you to my apartment. As always, you reassure me that you'll be fine and you drink your tea with an apologetic expression as usual. And I'm mad at you again, I reproach you again that someday you'll be taken to the hospital because of your actions. You lower your head and stare at your hands or the cup or the table. I don't know, what you are looking at, I don't know, why you close your eyes and I don't know, why I have to rub your cheeks again, when you start crying with helplessness, when you realize that I'm damn right. I hug you and you calm down by entwining your fingers with mine and saying something like my heartbeat lets you calm down. As always, poetry in every field.

Everything is okay again, when we're watching anime on the TV, eating pizza and drinking beer, which you like so much. And when you fall asleep with your head on my shoulder, I forget about everything. About your teasing, about your love for big breasts, about how sometimes you try to not give up a bit too much. I brush hair off your face, which wakes you up and you look at me confused. I explain that it's time to go to sleep. You nod your head and go to the bathroom, staggering slightly against the wall, maybe from exhaustion or maybe you've drunk too much beer after all.

I'm cleaning up the mess we made and I catch you, when you're stumbling over the bathroom threshold as you step out of it. You mumble that it's my style rather than yours. I walk you to the bedroom and cover you with the quilt.

When I return, you're already asleep. Or you just pretend. I turn off the light and slide under the cool sheets. I put my arm around your waist and I hear you chuckle softly. So you were pretending. You take my hand and you fall asleep. A bit uncomfortable, but I can handle this. Because despite everything, despite your teasing and too high expectations of yourself, I love you. Forever.

The end