Scent of the Rain

Band: Kizu&Xaa-Xaa

Pairing: Lime&Kazuki

Rating: 17+

Genre: romance

Warnings: alcohol

Note: Lime finds Kazuki on his doormat. With an alcohol-scented broken heart.

Men shouldn't cry.

This is what society wants and that is what we should follow.

We shouldn't cry, when something bad happened. We shouldn't cry after our beloved one's death. We shouldn't cry, when we have broken heart.

We shouldn't.

And usually we remember about it.

And then we're drunk and we forget about every social norms. About all the principles of operation of the modern world.

Kazuki was sitting on a doormat in front of the door to my home. With his knees tucked under his chin, his arms wrapped around his legs.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, folding the umbrella and, as usual, cutting my finger.

Typical.

He looked at me.

"Kazuki?" I crouched.

It was strange to look at him from above, because he's tall as a birch tree, and I... Well, I'm not one of the tallest people.

He smelled of rum and geosmine.

"What happened?" I asked, putting a hand on his cheek.

He was cold. His cheeks would be warm because of tears, but these big, dark clouds made this powerful downpour. But Kazuki's red eyes said that it wasn't only rain, which washed his cheeks.

"Kazu?" I looked in his eyes - black as a despair, which always was hiding in them.

They reminded me of my eyes. Maybe it was the reason, why I understood Kazuki better than other people did.

"Get up. Let's go inside. You can't sit here. You'll catch a cold" I smiled gently.

Kazuki stood up. He was still quiet.

The silence was interrupted by a the clang of the lock in the door. We went inside. My dogs were happy to see us.

"I have to go for a walk with them" I said quietly.

Kazuki looked at me, still not changing that pained face of his.

"I'm sorry. I will try to come back soon. Well, it's raining, so it isn't the best weather for a walk" I said, fastening Lemon's and Fuu-chan's leashes.

The roads turned into swift streams because of the rain. The umbrella bent in all directions.

I would have to throw it away.

I came home and unfastened my dogs' leashes. They rushed to their baskets at once and buried themselves in the blankets.

Kazuki fell asleep on the sofa. His clothes were still wet.

"You'll catch a cold" I sighed.

He opened his eyes. So he wasn't asleep?

"Can you tell me, what happened?" I've been annoyed already.

"Youhei... I mean, Roji. He broke up with me" explained Kazuki, staring at the wall. "It hurts, Lime. Maybe I'm too old to feel this pain. But it still hurts."

"It hurts, because you're drunk" I said, putting a blanket on Kazuki's shoulders. "When you'll sober up, it would stop hurting."

"It hurt, when I was sober before" he mumbled.

"But less. Alcohol only strengthens the pain because you lose control of your emotions" I stroked his head and hissed.

Stupid wound.

I looked at my hand. Because of the rain, a band aid was wet and peeled off. The blood that had not yet clothed began to trickle again.

Kazuki was watching it too. He took my hand gently and ran his index finger over the wound.

I hissed again. What the hell was he thinking?

"What are you doing?" I asked, watching as Kazuki spreads my blood on his fingers.

He probably lost his mind, I think.

"Kazu?" I put my left hand on his cheek and lifted his head, because I wanted to see his eyes.

He looked at me, still holding my hand.

He was completely drenched. I was a bit.

We both smelled like geosmine now.

And I don't know, why I pulled out my hand between Kazuki's fingers. Maybe because I wanted to put my hand on his other cheek and kiss his lips.

And maybe because he looked like a poor puppy and I am dog person.

And maybe because he's one of my best friends and maybe because of this I knew that he needed it.

And maybe because of this I helped to take off his clothes and I let him do it the same with mine.

He was submissive. Very submissive. As if he didn't care anymore.

And I didn't know if it was because of the alcohol or his mood or a little bit of both.

All I knew was that he hugged me right after I fell on him. I couldn't breath even more than a moment before.

Or maybe we both needed it? I don't know.

But for the first time I felt that it really didn't matter that he was twenty centimeters taller than me. And that he is three years older.

In bed we're the same.

And when it comes to the psyche, we're all the same.

Weak as brittle leaves in the fall.

Especially the two of us.

It might come as a surprise to some, but a broken heart doesn't really care what gender its owner is.

The end