Universe: Marvel
Pairing: Stephen Strange&Christine Palmer
Rating: 17+
Genre: romance, angst with happy ending
Warnings: spoilers, temporary character's death
Note: Christine's heart shattered after the Blip. She really tried to get over it. Really tried.
But it was in vain.
Blip.
I don't know, what happened.
Suddenly half of living beings turned to dust.
While staring blindly at the TV screen, I thought that it's this damn magic again.
Because magic killed them, right?
I got up to wash my coffee cup.
Did they die? Disappear?
I picked up the sponge.
And Stephen is going to do something about that. He's this wizard or sorcerer or something, after all.
Washing my cup, I heard knocking on the door.
I knew it. I probably jinxed it. As always.
I put the cup on the table top. Knocking intensified.
I didn't have to hurry. I have time.
For the last week I received informations that my aunts, uncles, cousins, patients and other people I know just stopped existing in one moment.
I have enough.
I opened the door and saw a raccoon dressed in small clothes, standing on his back paws.
...are you fucking kidding me?
"Good morning" he said quietly. "If this day can be good."
It's not.
"My name is Rocket. I'm looking for Mrs Christine Palmer" he said.
"Good morning" I said, letting it in. "Christine Palmer is me. And you are..."
"Guardian of the Galaxy. One of them" he replied, scratching panels with his claws, when he was walking. "Wong, you know the guy, right? Well, he told me to tell you that..."
"That doctor Strange is busy right now and sent you to tell me that he can't even call me, right?" I laughed, because it would be like him to do that.
But...
"Wait, why Wong didn't come by himself?" I looked in the racoon's sad eyes. "Where's doctor Strange?"
The raccoon sighed.
"Because he's the one, who is busy now, but he asked me to tell you that. You know, Mrs Christine, just in case. Because he didn't want you to think that Strange ignored you or something. You have to know that..."
"That Stephen won't come back" I finally understood and my legs gave up.
I sat on the floor.
Damned magic...
Rocket put his paw on my shoulder and I started crying.
I didn't cry, because I heard that someone disappeared.
My aunts or my cousin.
My friends and their pets.
My patients.
My neighbours.
My coworker and her daughter.
Emily, Rose, Lucy, Sylvia, Cecilia and Fred.
My uncles.
Everyone, who disappeared. Every animal.
No one made me sob so hard.
Even after this nice old gentleman, who was living in my staircase and smiling to me everytime, when I met him. He moved in recently and I didn't even know his name yet.
But after receiving the news of this one person's death, my heart shattered into million pieces.
I was sobbing and I couldn't stop.
This weird, antropomorphic raccoon was still sitting next to me.
He probably wanted to comfort me, even if he looked like he lost everything himself.
"You should lay down" he said calmly, leaving my flat. "I promise you that we're going to do everything to reverse it."
It was then, when I realised that he was talking like he himself cried for too long recently.
I got up from the floor and closed the door behind him. Swaying a little, I walked towards the sofa. Emotions made me feel like I was heavily injured. Really. Just like that.
Had Stephen felt like this, when he came to me for help? When this weird, magical weapon pierced his heart?
I laid down on the sofa and closed my eyes.
So you died? Just like that?
Yes.
It's also in your style. Disappearing just like that. Dying, before you visit me and talk to me seriously.
And, to be honest, I wanted to vanish with you...
* * *
"Christine, I'm talking to you" I heard Billy's voice.
I looked at him. He was annoyed.
"I'm sorry" I said quietly. "It's because of today. It's the anniversary of..."
"We all lost someone" he reminded me. "Half of population is gone. Don't make yourself the only victim."
"I'm not the only victim" I replied. "We all are."
"But you're acting like only you..."
"Billy, for God's sake, leave me alone!" I yelled at him. "I have enough. Enough of everything. Enough of waiting for some info..."
"A whole year has passed, Christine" he interrupted me. "You should get over it."
I should.
I clenched my fists.
Get over it, Christine. You're an adult woman. Believing that Stephen will come back is childish.
He died. The world is still moving.
It doesn't matter that yours stopped.
* * *
I looked at the rising sun.
Another day just started.
I took off my scrub and threw it on the sofa. I sat beside the window and looked at the tea in my cup.
Stephen liked it. I mean, he started liking it after he came back from this stupid magical training.
He changed. For the better. It was the only thing this stupid magic could repair.
Him.
And I loved him more and more.
And that's why this day covered my mind with a black fog again.
I closed my eyes.
I just want you to come back to me. To smile to me and talk to me about neurosurgery and that stupid magic. I just want that.
Or just put this funny cape of yours on my shoulders, which is going to make me fly. Even if I feel uncomfortable, because it seems to has its own mind.
Do something, Stephen. I've always laughed at your jokes, but I don't like this one.
Stop being dead.
* * *
I was laying in my bed, looking at the ceiling. Clock was ticking non stop, reminding me that time is flowing.
Chick chack chick chack tick tick tick.
Three years have passed. No one believed already that these people are going back. That anyone is going back.
Half of humanity was dead. That's a fact.
Chick chack chick chack chick chack.
Almost like a heartbeat.
Did my heart stop three years ago? Probably.
Chick chick chick chick chick chick.
I couldn't sleep for last few hours. I just woke up and I was laying there, staring at the ceiling.
Stephen...
One day, when you still had healthy hands, we were laying in your bed and you kept stroking my head, because my dog died. Then I wasn't sure, if this sudden empathy of yours was real or not, but now I know that it was.
Because your emotions always are real. Just hidden deeply on the bottom of your heart.
...oh, right, sorry.
They were.
Because they're gone just like you.
* * *
"Christine!"
I looked up. Billy was staring at me, furious.
"You forgot again that..."
"Sorry, Billy" I said quietly. "It's this day. It's..."
"Anniversary, yeah, I know" Billy interrupted me. "You've told me this before. And I repeat again. You have to get over it. Strange won't come back."
I felt like someone stabbed my heart again.
"Besides..." started Billy, leaning on the wall. "You're a doctor. You should be used to death. Meanwhile I'm just a nurse and I'm dealing with it better than you."
"You're right" I admitted. "I should. But I'm not."
Three years ago I told myself that I should get over it.
But I didn't, I just became weaker than before.
* * *
Five years have passed and I still felt just like I stopped existing with half of the humanity.
Suffering after losing friends and patients has passed.
Pain after my family members crumbled to dust. It didn't disappear, but I felt a lot better than before.
The exact moment I thought about Stephen, caused me pain. My heart was breaking again.
Just don't cry again, silly...
I heard some strange sound, like wings flipping.
I looked up through the window.
Birds.
A lot of birds.
I got up and walked to the window.
No. Not only birds.
People.
On the streets.
A lot of people.
What hap...
...
Did they rewind it?
My cellphone started to ring like crazy.
I kept getting phone calls.
I heard people crying of happiness.
The radio audition was interrupted by a reporter, who too disappeared five years ago.
And then I heard this weird noise as something was burning and someone took my phone from me.
"Oh, so that's why you don't pick up" I heard a voice I shouldn't hear anymore.
I turned around. Stephen was just standing there and looking into my eyes, still holding my cellphone.
"I have to go now, but I wanted you to know..."
"You're in shock again" I said weakly. "Just like then."
He smiled and kissed my cheek.
"See you later, Christine" he winked to me and closed the portal.
And I felt like my heart returning to its original shape.
* * *
I was napping on the sofa, when I heard this weird sound again. I opened my eyes and saw Stephen leaving one of his portals.
He looked like something bad happened. Something tragic and scary.
"Stephen?" I got up from the sofa.
He didn't answer. He silently closed the portal and took off his flying cape.
Or levitating. Whatever.
"Have we lost?" I asked, walking towards him.
He had scratches all over his body. And looked like he was crying just now.
But his wounds weren't serious.
"No" he replied shortly. "We won. Our world still exists."
"I'll bring you some sanitizer" I announced and went to the bathroom.
I came back after a moment. Stephen was standing in front of the window and was looking at the sleeping city.
"Can you tell me, what happened?" I asked, wiping his wound.
He looked at me. Did he really cry or it was just me?
"We saved the world" he said, staring at the evening sight behind the glass. "But I had to sacrifice a human life to stop the apocalypse."
"Many lifes?" I asked.
"Just one" he replied. "Just one, but it was still too much. He was someone's husband, someone's father, someone's friend. And I had to show him that it's the only chance among fourteen millions..."
WHAT?!
"...to win" Stephen closed his eyes.
I grabbed his hand. His fingers were trembling, like always.
"I think that he was aware of it" I told him. "Because he was a sorcerer too, wasn't he?"
"No" denied Stephen. "He was a scientist. A rich asshole, who thought he has everything."
"Just like you in the past?"
"Just like me in the past" he comfired. "I don't even know, if he liked me. Our relationship was complicated and short. But I feel like I killed him myself."
I tangled our fingers.
"You have to forgive yourself" I smiled slightly. "And tell me about your other wounds, so I can patch them."
"I have to take a shower first" he announced. "I am covered with five years of cosmic dust and then I had to fight some enlarged, purple alien."
I laughed and let go of his hand.
"What about your Sanctuary?" I asked.
"Wong can manage to take care of it for one day" replied Stephen, walking towards the bathroom. "He's the Sorcerer Supreme now."
I smiled and went to the kitchen to make tea with honey. I can wait another fifteen minutes. I've been waiting for five long years. Fifteen minutes is just a mouse versus an elephant.
And the last piece of my heart just glued to the rest of it in this exact moment.
The end
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